What Doesn't Kill You Makes You Stronger
Updated: May 19, 2019
Embrace the Journey
Five years ago I was in Cambodia on a mission trip and I had a dream. Not just any dream but a vivid, real life scary dream- you know the kind, the kind you wake up and know that a message has been given.
"When you can't control what's happening, challenge yourself to control the way you respond to what's happening. That's where your power is."
In my dream, two of my kids and I were on a big wooden ship-the kind with the tall mast they used in the old days. We were in the most violent storm I had ever seen and the boat was taken high up on a wave. I knew that when the boat came down it would be busted to pieces and we would have to fight to survive. That dream was a prophecy of the things to come and for the next four years I was in that storm.
The Eye of the Storm
Throughout this journey the waves continually hit me, I'd stand back up only to be hit by another one. There were times when I wondered if I would be able to get back up. I learned to find the eye of the storm- that special place when circumstances were out of my control where I could go and find peace. In my mind I saw it as the violent storm encircling me as I sat in the middle at peace in the quiet place. Later on, rather than seeing it as a violent storm circling me I envisioned Jesus and the Holy Spirit circling me and interceding for me. I had to be intentional to keep going to that place as it was easy to allow the circumstances to move me. Now it is easier to remain, or reenter quickly to that place of peace.
CAN YOU BE THANKFUL FOR THE STORM?
I was recently asked If I could be thankful for the storm because the storm may have saved us from the ships original destination. Although it's been the most difficult journey of my life, I can honestly say I am thankful. I am sad that my marriage is no longer together and my children have had to walk an incredibly difficult journey but there has been incredible growth, strength, change, value and clarity of vision that has been created throughout the journey. We don't often see it when we go through the fire but if we take the time to look back and open our eyes and hearts to see we can then come to a place of thankfulness.
Here is an entry from my journal as I looked back to answer that question. This was written after being crushed one more time by another wave.
"I have just been given the opportunity to stand once more, to determine who I'm going to be in the midst of cruelty. Throughout this journey I have had the opportunity to pray ALOT, share space with friends, build new friendships, emphathize with others, open my heart to receive love, trust myself and others again, and have deeper relationships. I got to CHOOSE where I will stand, how I will carry myself, accept support, wrestle with my faith and God, learn a massive amount about principle living, and pray more. Practice the 3 R's, Fact/meaning, Ground and centre, intention mechanism, competing commitments, use my contract statement and choose the qualities I will walk in each day/moment. I met an incredible group of amazing people through Klemmer who stood with me. I clarified my vision and dreams and moved toward that vision. I stepped into abundance thinking. So what / now what thinking, possibility vs probability, opportunity vs tragedy. I've been able to contribute to others, share the tools I've learned, walked the journey with my children and with women who are in similar situations. I've experienced the joy of committment, been loved unconditionally and feel like I've summited Everest many times. I have felt love like never before, support and strength.
Would have I chosen this shipwreck experience if it were up to me? Initially, probably not. However this experience has taught me I am stronger than I thought I was, I am able to create financially to live the life I desire. I have an amazing group of friends that love and support me, I know I will always have a choice, I have the ability to create solution, I've achieved my KCA coaching certificate. Nobody has the ability to wreck my days (unless I let them) I will move forward towards my dreams and have a powerful impact in the lives of women and people I meet. I will love large, receive love, and build an amazing relationship. The Klemmer tools are one of the best gifts I have given myself ever. Life happens, anything can change, I am satisfied and will walk with joy, peace, power, influence and love.
I pray that the amount that the enemy has come against me and tried to steal, kill and destroy that the Spirit would take this, turn it for His glory and use it 1 million times (or more) in the full power of the Spirit to take the enemy down and powerfully impact, deliver and bring freedom to others and glorify God worldwide in a massive way.
I WILL STAND- TURANGAWREWRE!!!!!"
I AM THANKFUL